First day is a win
After I got over my initial urge to, well, vomit myself, I managed to do all right today.
I can't help it. I sat in the front row. I know what they say about the gunners and all, but I've always been a front row person. Having nothing to do with competitiveness, which...yes I know I am, but this has nothing to do with it, I swear- I can't sit in the back of the room. I'll fall asleep, daydream, secretly text Betsy, pretend I'm at the pool, watch the person's head in front of me, get annoyed how the girl down the row is twirling her hair. I find it more a distraction than anything else. I sat on the end, and no one sat next to me, for which I was glad. I get really nervous when I don't know anyone and in those moments, I speak to no one. I think I give off a vibe of snottiness, but really its petrifiedness.
I had had a minor panic attack earlier when I first walked into class and realized I forgot my adult shoes. Yup, showed up in flops. A dress.... and my pool flops. It's summer and I forgot! Started sweating about my stupid shoes when I realized I didn't actually care and allowed myself a pass.
I was feeling much better about the whole experience until the Professor asked us to pull out our reading assignment and notes she had given us to have prepared for today. Internal gasp. Epic fail. I left it in my bag at the ranch in Texas. Oh God. Slight panic. As to not draw attention to myself for the next topic at hand, I quickly raise my hand, though I'm sweating all over, and ask a question about the current topic. She answers and fires back a hypothetical at me, first one of the day for the group. It goes silent. I managed to remember my name and where I was and answered confidently. Whew, first one over. And my tactic worked- she skipped me for the next assignment. Point for me.
We then got down to briefing cases, something with which I am familiar, having worked at a firm in NYC for a year. Thirty minutes go by and I am finishing my last little thought when the professor asks, "Were any of you able to brief that case and feel good about it within this past half hour?" I am rereading my brief so I don't pay attention to anyone else and raise my hand. I look up and realize I am the only one raising my hand. Oh God. I can't be the gunner. I put my hand down. Just kidding. No way am I going to be that person. Not on the first day.
Note to self- don't raise your hand if you will look like a know it all- you need friends and next time you probably won't know jack.
Other note to self- tomorrow don't forget to wear a slip if you decide to wear a thin skirt. Oops.
I can't help it. I sat in the front row. I know what they say about the gunners and all, but I've always been a front row person. Having nothing to do with competitiveness, which...yes I know I am, but this has nothing to do with it, I swear- I can't sit in the back of the room. I'll fall asleep, daydream, secretly text Betsy, pretend I'm at the pool, watch the person's head in front of me, get annoyed how the girl down the row is twirling her hair. I find it more a distraction than anything else. I sat on the end, and no one sat next to me, for which I was glad. I get really nervous when I don't know anyone and in those moments, I speak to no one. I think I give off a vibe of snottiness, but really its petrifiedness.
I had had a minor panic attack earlier when I first walked into class and realized I forgot my adult shoes. Yup, showed up in flops. A dress.... and my pool flops. It's summer and I forgot! Started sweating about my stupid shoes when I realized I didn't actually care and allowed myself a pass.
I was feeling much better about the whole experience until the Professor asked us to pull out our reading assignment and notes she had given us to have prepared for today. Internal gasp. Epic fail. I left it in my bag at the ranch in Texas. Oh God. Slight panic. As to not draw attention to myself for the next topic at hand, I quickly raise my hand, though I'm sweating all over, and ask a question about the current topic. She answers and fires back a hypothetical at me, first one of the day for the group. It goes silent. I managed to remember my name and where I was and answered confidently. Whew, first one over. And my tactic worked- she skipped me for the next assignment. Point for me.
We then got down to briefing cases, something with which I am familiar, having worked at a firm in NYC for a year. Thirty minutes go by and I am finishing my last little thought when the professor asks, "Were any of you able to brief that case and feel good about it within this past half hour?" I am rereading my brief so I don't pay attention to anyone else and raise my hand. I look up and realize I am the only one raising my hand. Oh God. I can't be the gunner. I put my hand down. Just kidding. No way am I going to be that person. Not on the first day.
Note to self- don't raise your hand if you will look like a know it all- you need friends and next time you probably won't know jack.
Other note to self- tomorrow don't forget to wear a slip if you decide to wear a thin skirt. Oops.
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