Gabriela Catalina's First Day of Kindergarten

Thank God today is only half day.  Tomorrow I'll be a hot mess for sure.  It took everything in me not to bawl my eyes out on the walk over to school. 

Is she going to be okay? 
Is she going to get picked on?
Does it really matter that she's a good six inches shorter than everyone in her class?
Does it really matter that she can't boast the big FIVE years and is only a measly four and half?
Do kids that young care?
Is she going to remember what to say if a kid is bullying her?
Is she going to make friends?

Is she, for the love of God, going to remember to put toilet paper on the toilet seat????

I met two kids in her class- they seem really nice.  Justin and Sophia.  Sophia is about 8 inches taller than her and Justin clears her by a foot. 

I turned to leave, told her I was going, that I'd be back really soon, just like in preK, that today was a short day.  She stiffened, stood as tall as she could and looked at her new friends.  I'm sure she noticed they could eat her.  Her face turned red and she became quiet.  I leaned in and whispered, "okay?  I'll be right here when you are done, I promise." She asked me not to go, to wait for her right outside the door.  I told her I was going downstairs for coffee and that when she was done, I'd be right outside her door.  I turned before I cried.

In the yard, with all the other parents- who did not look the least bit phased by dropping of their child to some unknown stranger, I tried to be nice.  Then I focused on Colton.  Children are great excuses when you don't feel like talking to anyone. I didn't.  I saw a girlfriend of mine who just dropped of her daughter in Gabriela Catalina's class.  She said she saw GC and I asked how she was doing.  My friend paused and said, "She seems to be okay. She is off in a corner playing by herself.  But she doesn't seem unhappy."  I left. 

I called my friend Jen for the walk home for a distraction.  That's the thing I love about friends.  Good for distractions of various kinds when you need it the most.  Because of my friend, I kept myself in check until I got home. I let myself have a few tears over my baby leaving me a year early and then I remembered Colton.  And how he is on his fourth muffin/doughnut/cookie.  He's had a GREAT day.  Except for wanting to go to kindergarten, too. 

I'm excited to see how she faired.